170410 – Day 100 – Back to the light

Well obviously this weekend was a trainwreck. I got caught up in all the events and opinions surrounding the terror attack and got swallowed up by the political monster again. It’s been three days of horrors, extreme emotions, lots of ragey social media posts, and really bad things. Last night it went back to normal.

Honey allowed me three days, and now I’m back on the right side of the track. Focusing on magick, spirituality. Love. Just today I got two new tarot decks. They are absolutely gorgeous, and hopefully good to work with. I will take pictures of them later. I am very happy. Also, despite the fact I love my old ones, it’s a new phase, and I need some new things that I can imbue with the spirit of this age.

In the nineties, when I worked with this, it was a different age. Everything was more innocent and less complicated. Now it’s dark and dramatic and it’s all a struggle. However, I have sweetheart, I have magick, I have my spirituality and my curiosity to never stop learning. I have so many things within myself. I just need to rein it all in and stop letting my emotions destroy me. Stop getting carried away with negativity. Just keep all the passions, but rein them in, focus them, control them. Control myself.

That is really what it is all about. That is the core of my problem. Whether physical, emotional or psychological, I tend to not have a stop mechanism. I go through the wall at every turn. So rituals, habits, things like that are essential to me. Which is why I try to implement them.

Last night we listened to the first Unslaved podcast again. And I got it. I think it was the fourth time listening to it, and the light finally lit up. Sometimes I’m a bit slow, but better late than never, right? They speak, somewhat veiled, about being worthy of the information (not theirs specifically, but spiritual knowledge), to make changes in your life and be more aware of what you are doing, what you are putting in your body, what you take into yourself. How you treat your body, how you treat yourself. etc.

In other words, exactly what I have become acutely aware of these past few months and what I am really making a final effort to fix. That felt pretty good, hearing that advice from people I like and admire.

Anyhow, at work now again, and skipping politics, so back on track. I also finally bought shoes, so no more nagging about that. And it’s spring and getting warm enough to walk without feeling uncomfortable. All is good. Except for Islamists.



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