I guess it could be the alcohol, or the boring new years eve, again, or the week before with mother, or just the fact that I haven’t really been able to be myself, alone, and do what I want for about three weeks, which is pretty much torture for an HSP INFJ.
Add some Scorpio frustration to that, and yeah, that’s probably why I feel so fucking weird.
The holidays have SUCKED this year, no off days, except those I spent with mom. I love her, I love her sooo much, but omg it’s really trying. We live such different lives with time schedules and food schedules and what she wants to do and what I want to do and so on. I work tomorrow, from six a.m. so I have to plunge into bed soon. Which I kind of look forward to due to the company I’m keeping at the moment. I will try to write here every day this year, because I noticed it’s really good for me to get things off my chest, how off-color, boring, or superinteresting they may be, it’s good for me.
I will also try to keep spiritual in every way, I will work on myself for myself, and I will write and create more. I’m looking forward to 2017.
I found 2016 to be a remarkable year. I know people mostly say it was horrible, and I do lament the fact that we lost Leonard Cohen, Bowie and George Michael, but I find Brexit and Trump quite refreshing, and I got a superior vitamin injection from finding the sparkly joyous love of my life in May. I’ve been smiling more, enjoying things more, I’ve been to Patmos, I’ve learned things I never thought I would, and I have new interests, new favourite artists, new things I care about. I’m still developing, still learning, and that is a brilliant thing.
And even though Sweden is in dire straits, I am still fighting, and the number of people who see the truth of the world is growing every day, so yes, there is hope. There is always hope. My sunshine has made me see the brighter things in life this year as I was in a pretty dark place when I found him. Which is good. I have however not become naive, but still seek the truth everywhere and question everything that doesn’t sound right.
I will be degenerate and eat icecream now, and then go to bed.
A lot of icecream. 😛